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As you read the word, what do you feel? A touch of shame, a spark of excitement, a twinge of disgust...maybe all of the above?

My entire childhood, I was (with the best intentions) taught that money is hard to come by, that only certain people truly deserve it, that rich people were selfish and heartless...and I certainly didn't want to be judged as selfish or heartless. Nope; I wanted to stay humble and relatable!

Even though I'd heard repeatedly that we should not "serve money," this did not stop me from intimately tying my self-worth to how much money I had. I remember feeling so guilty as a kid for wanting more than what I had.

I learned to be grateful and generous with what I did have, and for that I am grateful. I remember visiting an orphanage at the age of 5, carrying my favorite Pooh bear stuffy. It struck me hard seeing kids that had nothing but a bed in a large room; no toys to play with. I remember the look in that child's eyes when I gave her my most prized possession in the world, feeling the warmth of love and gratitude in my little body.

Throughout my life, there's so much more I've wanted to give. So much more I've wanted to experience and receive. But deep down, I didn't feel that an abundance of money was safe for me, and I felt I wasn't worthy of it. I believed it was somehow more righteous or praiseworthy to have just enough, even if it often meant not knowing how we were going to provide groceries for the family that week.

Fast forward to the beginning of 2016, having just given birth to my fourth child, already struggling for months with the autoimmune disorder that soon took over my life for the next year. My husband was in the thick of his darkest period of life: checked out of life, in intense pain, couch-ridden, and depressed.

We had just moved to San Diego, and our rent was exactly double what it was in Los Angeles...and it was up to me to provide financially.

The stress of taking care of our four kids, managing an autoimmune disorder that was ravaging my body from the inside out, and caretaking my checked-out husband, the stress of financial hardship was more than I could handle. We'd already declared bankruptcy before moving to L.A., and I knew that doing it again wouldn't solve any of our problems.

So I got on unemployment as much as I could while I figured out my next business launch, and our family survived on food stamps. When I'd see an influx of money, there was always worry of the next influx not coming.

In fact, I distinctly remember the feelings of shame, guilt, and hopelessness as I stood outside my car in tears, about to pump gas into our vehicle that wasn't even big enough for our family, with $7 to my name. In that moment, I had to decide whether to spend those seven dollars on food or gas.

Scarcity. Fear. Survival.

Those words described my feelings around money. And I knew deep down that for my external reality to shift - in my body, my marriage, my family, and my finances - my internal reality would need an overhaul.

In the midst of our darkest times, I discovered various strategies, tools, and healing modalities to help me begin to transform my relationship with my body, my husband, my sexuality, and, finances. Not only that, I experienced firsthand how intimately connected they all are.

Making more space in my life for pleasure and play helped me release the constant feeling of scarcity and being in survival mode. Choosing integrity and presence over people-pleasing others made it possible to have the thriving, loving, passionate relationship I have with my husband today. Prioritizing my alignment and peace over others' projections of how I should be making money freed up my energy to do what truly lights me up AND fills my bank account...without a feeling of desperation, exhaustion, or grueling hustle.

While you may have followed my work or completed my courses to reconnect with your body, have your first orgasm, heal your inner child, or reignite the passion in your relationship...if MONEY feels ick or scary to you and you'd like to feel more at peace with money AND receive more of it, this course is for you.

What Is Yummy Money?

Yummy Money is my upcoming 21-day course, designed to help you create a pleasurable, connected, trusting relationship with money.

In any relationship you have with another human, certain patterns, mindsets, beliefs, old wounds, and long-held resistances impact the way you experience and interact with that person. In Yummy Money, I'll be guiding you through powerful practices, prompts, and exercises to help you redefine and reconstruct your relationship with money. You'll also be provided with tools and processes to take the next logistical steps in your abundance journey.

This experience is unorthodox and out-of-the-box, in typical Wild Awakening style!

Register today!